CRYING BLOOD,BLEEDING TEARS *
These people do not know me. They just cannot be taking me for granted. I am a joke to them. It’s
nice. I drove to Venda and went to Mashudu first. She was staying in some B&B there. When ii got
there she was home. Great. I picked the door and entered. Money makes the world go round so it
was easy for me. Everyone is probably wondering how I know all that is happening well…I have
been keeping tabs on Ethan and Mashudu. I used to be a gang leader and left that life when I wanted to be legitimate in all that I do. Well until now when I found out these two were taking me
for a rollercoaster ride. I got there and picked her up and walked with her to my car and put her in
the backseat. She was sleeping so peacefully. I walked back and closed her door then drove
home. I came out of the car and locked it then walked inside the house. Ethan was shocked to see
me standing there. He looked like he had seen a ghost. Who knows…i might just be his worst
Ethan: What are you doing here?
Me: No hello cousin? Nothing? Okay Ethan: I asked you a question.
Me: Well I came to fetch my woman.I sometimes wonder why you just don’t learn..Should I f–k
you up so that you get the message loud and clear or should I just shoot your balls? Ethan: Like
you would dare…
LESLEY I was only able to come home when they allowed to put Rudzani in the same ward with
Ipfi.Stan’s car was in the yard
Me: Oh great.Now I have to deal with two immature old men. When I got inside they were arguing.
Me: Why do you both like following me around.Akere I left you guys to enjoy life.What is it that you
want from me?
Stan: Chill bro what would I want from a broke ass nigga like you.Besides I’m not gay..I came here
to take my woman home. I laughed really loud.
Me: Which woman? You refer to that lose thing a woman.On a serious note you both should really
stop eating my leftovers though.The very same ‘woman’ who has been f—–g Ethan and then
even have guts to come begging me for love back.Aowa Stan learn to differentiate between a
woman and an immature girl.I really do wish that you both could leave this place so that I can be in
peace.I was really living in peace before you came with your drama..
Stan: I do not wish to stay in such filth thank you..And you (pointing at Ethan) Stay away from
Mashudu or else I won’t hesitate to do exactly what I said I will do.Im not bluffing. He walked out.
Me: Its about time you also leave Ethan.Sharon must be waiting for you. I walked out to my room
to sleep..Its been a long day and all I want is for the night to pass so that I can go see my women
at the hospital. The following day I woke up and I found Ethan smartly dressed.
Me: Good morning.
Ethan: Hey bro.Can we talk?
Me: Sure.I still have time before going to the hospital. We sat down. Ethan: I know I screwed up.I
know all I did when we maturely grew up was to take away every girl you had.I have learnt my
lesson now..I want us to be brothers again.I want you to trust me..
Me: actions will have to speak louder this time.
Ethan: I’m leaving..can I have my car keys?
Me: Yeah sure.
‘ I gave him the keys.He stood up then left. I have ran out of money.How will I get to the hospital now? I went to search in my room but nothing.I went to search in the room Ethan was occupying
and I found a suitcase on the bed. I ran outside to go tell Ethan that he left his luggage but he was
long gone. I went back into the house with so many questions. Was Ethan coming back? Why
would he leave his luggage behind? I went back to the room and opened the suitcase. I got the
shock of my life. I was not expecting to see so much money. There was a letter on top of the
money. I opened and it read…
‘ Dear Lesley
I know that you have a lot of questions but I’m not there to answer them. I am sorry for neglecting
you at your lowest and I am sorry for not being the ideal brother. With this money take care of
yourself and Rudzani. Not forgetting the little one. I am sorry for what I said about her. She’s the
one for you. Love her.
What Lesley said made sense and frankly he was telling the truth. I had been jealous of him most
of the time and I think it’s about time that I talk to my parents about Lesley. If they do not change
their mind then they will lose another son. I left Les a lot of money and the way I know my brother,
I trust that he will put it to good use. I organised for people to extend the house he’s living in now
and I have already paid in full and bought the material. We cant be living and enjoying the
luxurious life while one of us suffers. I’m not one to pour my heart out but honestly what I saw
broke my heart. It hit home. It cut deep. I just can’t. I drove into the garage to buy snacks and refill
my tank. While waiting I called Les.
Les: Brother thank you so much. I wanted to call you so I could thank you but I don’t even have
Me: Calm down Les. I’ve got your back. Always know that.
Les: Thank you Ethan. This means a lot. But why the sudden change of heart?
Me: Story for another day man. Listen there are people coming in tomorrow to extend the house
so please move into the back room and also there’s a little something I got to show you how sorry
I am for the chaos and havoc I caused whilst there. It’s nothing much but it’s something.
Les: This house is fine and what is this gift that you’re talking about. Tell your brother man
Me: No let it be a surprise. Anyway check your bank balance. I also transferred some money there
and hopefully that will keep you going for some time. The builders have been paid. We will talk
soon Les. I love you man
Les: You sound gay man. But I love you too brother.
I then dropped the call. It felt like the old times when we were still very close. D–n I loved my
brother. I still do. I mean…he is my blood. I paid, got into my car and joined the road back…
Mashudu Stanley. This man will be the end of me I tell you.I dont even know how I got back here.I was
shocked to wake up next to him,its was even creepy because he was looking at me while i was
sleeping.He is not the Same guy that I met. He is not the person I pretended to ‘fall in love with’. I
hate him.I wish he was dead. He walked in with a bunch of red, pink and white roses, Fererro
Roche chocolates and a bottle of moet. He stood there until I decide to lie down. I felt him lying
down next to me. No one said a word as we drifted off to deep sleep.
*CRYING BLOOD,BLEEDING TEARS *
Rudzi: They said I can go home today but they will be keeping Ipfi here see a therapist.I don’t want
to leave her here Les.
Me: Babe don’t worry we will come and see in all visiting hours.Please don’t stress too much.
Rudzi: I really feel responsible for what happened to her because I should have reported that
pervert when he tried his luck with me.But then still she said it’s not him but some old man she
refused to date
Me: Don’t beat yourself too much babe.You wouldn’t have known..Did she mention the name?
Rudzi: She didn’t mention alot because that’s when you came with the car.I swear I will kill a dog if
I find out who it is.
Me: Babe come let’s go and see her before we go and sign your discharge forms…
We walked out to Ipfi’s ward.
No one could compare to the pain I feel deep inside.Being sexually abused is not something to be
taken lightly.I felt my soul leave my body when that man took my innocence forcefully.rage builds
up whenever I think about that moment.I haven’t cried since I woke up today but instead I have
rage deep inside of me.All I can think of is killing myself.Where was God when that man did this to
me.Where was God when mom abused my sister? Where was he when my step father pleased
himself with me telling me that he is preparing me for the day when he will finally enter me.Where
was He when my step father prepared me for that old man to molerstrate me?
I was so lost deep In my thoughts when Rudzani and Les walked in..She had a worried look on
her face..Honestly I don’t know how she does it..She never takes it all to heart..You will never find
her breaking because of all this.Growing up I have witnessed all that she went through in the arms
of the woman we call our mother.I felt her arms hug me
Rudzi: Baby are you okay?
Les: Is there anything you need?
I shook my head no.
Honestly I didn’t have the courage to speak.I was so afraid that my voice will betray me.The
moment I saw my sister tears were on the verge of falling so talking will just make me cry.
Rudzi: I’m here for you babe every step of the way.
Days went by with me at the hospital..I spoke to the therapist twice a day and they said I was
ready to go home.They say i am but honestly in not.Im not ready to face this cruel world..How do I
walk out this hospital and pretend like in okay?
Les: Are you ready?
I nodded..I haven’t spoken to him nor Rudzani since the incident.They just came to see me and
they would crack jokes which them both will laugh.It never tickled me a bit.Its like I have turned
into a zombie.
We walked out the hospital and lucky there was a taxi and we got in then went..When we got
home I just felt the back of my hair stand..Something was not right.When we got inside there he
was holding my sister by her hair.There was also a very beautiful girl holding a scissors…
Tendi: I have asked you a thousand times to stay away from Les but it seem like you don’t listen.
I didn’t care why they were here.My mind dated back to that day when he even switched the lights
on for me to see him have his way with me.
There was a wooden chair next to me so I took it and charged at him.Mind you they didn’t see us.I
hit him at the back with the chair.
Boss: What the f–k.
I had tears on my face.
Me: I HATE YOU!! I WISH YOU BURN ON HE’LL FOR RAPING ME.I WISH YOU BAD LUCK ALL
YOUR LIFE..I WISH THAT ONE DAY SOMEONE RAPES YOUR CHILDREN AND YOUR WIFE
WHILE YOU ARE WATCHING.
I ran out..I ran as fast as my feet could..I was very much hurt.I didn’t even know where I was
going.I just kept on running..A car stopped next to me.
Woman: Need a lift?
Me: Where are you going?
Woman: Im on a road trip.Im going to Cape Town.
Me: I’m going there too.
Woman: Without bags? Or even a purse?
Me: I was left behind by my family.I will find them that side.
Woman: Atleast I will have company anyway..
Me: Borrow me a pen and paper.
She gave me and I wrote a letter then gave the boy who was selling things next to the road.I told
him that if someone ask about me he must give them the letter.
This woman was creepy.How can she allow without even confirming with my family.
Woman: By the way my name is Siphokazi Boitumelo Mokoena but they call me Boity or Kazi.
Me: I’m Ipfi mam
Kazi: Nice name.Hey I’m only 23 years old so stop making me look like I’m 30 or 40.
Me: Are you married?
She looked down.
Kazi: Topic for another day.Im just around here to enjoy life..Moving from one place to another
Me: Can I join
Kazi: I thought you said you were..
Me: I ran away.I was raped so staying there will be my downfall especially emotionally.
She looked at me.
Kazi: Okay..Do you have a phone?
Kazi: Good.I don’t want people tracking us.
Me: He raped her because I didn’t listen.They almost used scissors on my face Les.Now Ipfi ran
away.She is not emotionally okay right now and she can even do something tragic.
Les: Babe please calm down we will find her.
We were walking down the streets asking people if they have seen her.
Me: Have…have you se…
Les: Have you seen this girl?
He was holding a picture of Ipfi
Boy: Yes..She got in an Audi A5 car of some woman.
Boy: Yes and it was a few minutes ago.She asked me to give you this.
Me: Oh my God Lesley they have abducted my sister.They are going to use her parts for rituals..
Be took the letter and read it out loud.
‘Dont search for me because I don’t want to be found.I need to heal far away from Venda.Take
care of yourself and the baby.I will come back when I’m ready’
I sat on the ground crying.Lesley carried me and took me home.He went out leaving me alone.
I went to the police station to report and they just told me that they will get to it even after I told
them that she ran out when she saw the man who raped her.Did they give a f–k? No..they they
say is one thing.I really don’t know why the people who are supposed to help us keep doing this to
us.They were worse even after they saw the letter.They told me that she left on her own will so
they won’t be searching for her.
I went home stressed because this will only stress Rudzi more.
Rudzi: Did you find her?
Rudzi: Oh my God