That day as we went home, nobody spoke about Sharon to me. Rather they all talked about their exploits during the break, some traveled, some went on sight seeings, and others had a busy schedule.
It is called disappointment because it wasn’t expected, you won’t be so down if you expected a disappointment and it came.
Sharon kept up with her strange act all through the week and despite how I tried not to worry about her attitude it keeps getting me so worried. On Friday afternoon she had a problem with one of our class boys. Charlie was a boy that loves playing with everybody not minding their mood. His play was a sarcastic type, he’d keep annoying young till you lose it completely. Sharon was just coming from break when Charlie blocked her . She tried leaving but the dude kept blocking her, Sharon pushed him off and he drew her by hair. That made her lose it, I’ve never seen Sharon in fury. She gave Charlie slaps repeatedly and Charlie couldn’t endure any more and hit her back. Actually I wasn’t in class currently so, I didn’t watch the beginning but, when I came in I saw Sharon grab Charlie tightly on his jacket, two of his buttons out already. Poor Charlie couldn’t touch her anymore because he was held by Kingsley but Sharon wouldn’t let anyone touch her not even chidimma nor Kelvin. I was scared to go near her in such rage, I might be the next to see her monster but, Chidimma ran up and dragged me.
“Come your friend is losing it completely”. She said dragging me and I hesitated.
“You’re also her friend but she didn’t see you, why would she see me”. I protested
” Godson don’t tell me you’re afraid “.
” I’m not “. I lied.
” now go and calm her down and don’t disappoint me ” she pushed me towards them.
I got there and when they saw me everybody trying to hold her left her and went to their seat. I grabbed her hands off Charlie, and she tried dragging her from me, even tried to bite me. I guess she didn’t look at my face yet.
“Sharon that’s enough”. I said calmly.
I held her two hands tightly, I didn’t even prevent her from biting me, I didn’t care. Immediately she heard my voice, she stopped dragging, she calmed down totally. She only gave Charlie a dead look then pulled her hands forcefully from mine and walked straight to her seat. She didn’t even look at my face .
“Well you actually did it bro, you’re the genius”. Chidimma whispered to my ear and left. Sharon’s mood didn’t help me at all but the more she keeps getting dull the more dull I was too. But, the fact that I couldn’t ask her or I was scared to ask her or much more maybe too proud to ask her was quite the bigger challenge. When I went to sit down, she was crying, her face buried on her desk. That was something I hated the most to see her tears. Its true John legend said “even when she’s crying she’s still beautiful” and he is right she still is but something is missing and that’s her smile. And she can never smile if she’s crying so, right there I felt the need to cuddle her
To keep her head on my shoulder and wipe her tears but yet a part of me kept discouraging me. I couldn’t stand her tears but I couldn’t do anything but sit, that uneasiness made me stand up and leave the class, I met our Basic tech teacher at the door and lied I was sent for by the principal. I went into J. S. S. 1B and sat there till it was almost school over before I came back. Sharon was already set to leave, just waiting for the bell to be rung. Immediately she heard the bell, she ran out. well I’ve got a lot of questions to answer, if not from the outlawz then from my sister.
of course while going home the topic amongst the outlawz was Sharon and I was getting all the questions.
“Aruba what’s up with your shima nah” Melody started
“e be like you make am vex see as she dey boil water give all man”. Stanley joined in.
” una don break up? “. captain asked.
” as in eh, the LT just dey para give all man, una still dey reason sha?” choco asked too. they all had questions but I wondered why I was the one to answer them but I didn’t say anything to anyone.
“but she dey give you your maximum oh, see as you hold am she come chill like freezer”. Kingsley said and they all started hailing me.
” e don do”. Kelvin said and they all calmed down.
I got home that day in such a dull mood and even though I tried to hide it my sister noticed. she asked me what it was but I claimed it was nothing.
“yes that reminds me, are you both finally dating?”. she asked.
” who?”. I pretended I didn’t know who she was talking about. she gave me a “spit it out” look and like magic I conceded.
“fine, we’re not dating and we’re not gonna be dating anytime soon. is that okay?”. I walked into the sitting room to avoid more questions but she followed me.
” she’s behind this your moody face ain’t she? “.
“sister?”. I exhaled loudly.
” she’s always been behind it”. she laughed and continued.
“oh mum’s pet is in love, come on tell me what happened?”.
” what do you care? so you can go ahead and laugh over it? never mind”. I flung the remote I was holding and left.
I don’t really know if she was trying to cheer me up by laughing but I felt so bad knowing she found it funny.
I went into my parent’s bedroom and laid on there bed. She came in too and sat close to me. I knew she’d start talking soon or maybe she wasn’t going to say anything but I didn’t want to hear anything yet so, I took one of the pillows and covered my head till I slept off. When I woke up, she was still there and I felt like sleeping again. I closed my eyes, then she started talking.
“Today you had your longest siesta bro, you were asleep for three hours “. She informed me.
” so? Is not abnormal is it?”. I said after stretching for a while.
“Well it’s actually abnormal or weird I could say for you, it’s 5:00pm your afternoon sleep has never gone past an hour”. She winked at me, she was trying to tease me.
” what’re you doing? Keeping a new list of what makes me an Alien?”.I asked her and sat up. She smiled when i said that.
My mum told me the story of how sister Eunice believed I was an extraordinary kid when I was just two years. She would always watch me closely with a paper and a pen, any move she feels wasn’t normal for a kid she would write it down. And when asked, she’d say she was keeping a list of what made me an Alien. She later threw the paper away when my dad scolded her about it
“Oh Chuks you know I was just trying to cheer you up”. She patted my head.
” yes? Like you did earlier this afternoon “. She breathed in deeply as I still seem to be pissed.
” okay, I apologise”. She had that sorry look as she said that.
“You’re always good at that”. I said referring to her apology.
” least better than you”. She winked at me.
“Okay you win”. I laid back down.
” care to tell me what happened? “.
I’ve been waiting for her to ask, I needed someone to pour out to, and there was no better option than Eunice. I delayed for a moment before saying anything.
“I don’t know, she’s been so sad lately, snubbing everyone totally”. I explained calmly.
” including you?”. She asked me.
“Well, she doesn’t snub me actually but doesn’t talk to me neither, quite cold in class, everything different from what she used to be”. It seemed difficult explaining it.
” I understand, maybe she’s hurt, something must’ve happened at home like she lost someone or someone is sick….”.
“No I don’t think so, her sisters are all okay”. I protested.
” you know her sisters? “. She asked surprised.
” yes, they’re all in my school, jenny the senior, has become unusually all smiles towards me and Miriam too has been her usual cheerful self”. I narrated. I’ve never really wondered why jenny always asked me about her sister when they left the same house but now it got me thinking.
“Seems you have a history with both”. She smiled.
“Pleasant and dull memories I’d say” I shrugged.
” so what did they think about her”. She asked me.
“I don’t know, I never asked them”. I replied and looked the other direction.
” why?”. She was confused at my response.
“I don’t want them to start feeling that am being too caring about their sister”.
“What’s wrong with that? Oh I forgot it’s still you after all. Let me ask you, does Sharon even know you feel the same way she feels for you?”. She asked and I didn’t respond.
“I guess not, you’re always the hard man, no one needs to know you have a soft heart right?”. She was telling me this like she has read me completely.
” has anyone ever told you you’re too proud?”. She asked.
“Non, except you, you keep repeating it everyday”. I was becoming uncomfortable listening to her, tell me my problems instead of the solutions. I climbed down to leave.
” yeah,you can leave if you want, the truth can be annoying “. She smiled at me. I knew she still had a lot to say and possibly the solution so, I turned.
” yeah, what am I supposed to do”. I spread my hands like am lost.
“what you should’ve done a long time ago, let out your feelings stop caging them. if you care for someone then let them feel how much you care for them. or you think hiding your feelings makes you a strong man? Actually it makes you weak”. she lectured. it was more of a lesson now than just few words I was expecting at first.
” All these years I’ve always told you how much I love you as my kid bro, has it done me harm in anyway? you know I’m actually wondering what made that poor girl become so fond of you”. I laughed when she said that last line. She was actually right I don’t really know why Sharon decided to be so close to of all the dudes in school.
“you mean am not worth her friendship?”. I asked her, she didn’t say anything but shrugged. I laughed and made to leave but turned back to tease her.
” you know I’ve also been wondering, did you have any boyfriend when you were my age?”. she picked a pillow and hurled it at me while I ran outside laughing. that’s how I normally say thanks to her by pulling her legs.
Eunice’s words were true, I always hide my feelings unnecessary, hoping someone will read my heart, see it through my eyes but except my family no one has been able to understand that till I met Sharon. I believed she knew I cared for her even though I suck at showing it. But I decided that come Monday I’d try so much to be whom she was to me, that care, and love she showed me, I’d try to show her back.